Oh my god.
Sweet creeping monkey carcasses.
Holy zombie abortions and phlegm-covered demon entrails!

I seriously need somebody to explain something to me. Seriously. How is it that the people in charge of ordering bunker room supplies haven’t been fired, deported, executed, defenestrated, or otherwise punished for their complete inability to stock that miserable pit of despair with properly functioning equipment? This is not a rhetorical question. I really would like an answer. How is it possible to completely fail in every aspect of a job and still remain employed? Is the bunker room some sort of hilarious corporate joke for bored managers with nonexistent budgets and a total lack of excuses?

I’m wondering if this is a simple breakdown in communication. Perhaps the omniscient overseers of budget and ordering have simply not received the memo that the bunker room is a travesty and an embarrassment to all who are forced to be associated with it. When it falls to me to hand out the batteries that I know perfectly well will fail within an hour, I look like the uncaring simpleton to the selectors who hate me for giving them obviously faulty equipment. They have seething hatred in their eyes as they stare at me and their hate is justified. I know perfectly that I’m not the half-wit who should have ordered new batteries several months ago. I’m also not the half-wit who refuses to order new belt clips. But this half-wit does indeed exist. Who is it? To whom should I pass on this pent-up and well-justified animosity?

Here is a partial list of problems and complaints with the bunker room:
The batteries are laughably inadequate.
The T2 units are old, broken, and nearly worthless.
The batteries are laughably inadequate.
The T5 units are new, broken, and nearly worthless.
The batteries are laughably inadequate.
We are supposed to use only the T2 units, but we have only T5 belt clips. People hold $5000 units onto their belts with tape.
The batteries are laughably inadequate.
Ask around. I’m sure you can find several more issues.

I find myself repeatedly embarrassed by this situation and I’m not even at fault. How then can it be possible for the people who are at fault to wear Hannaford badges, parade as competent employees, attend productivity meetings, answer to their superiors, and receive paychecks in good conscience when they are perfectly aware that they are abysmal failures at their jobs? Am I being too harsh. probably. But I think it’s about time that someone actually offered a real answer to these glaringly obvious issues. Has no one ever bothered to ask why H- pays more for faulty T-unit time credits in a single week than the cost of 20 new T2 batteries? Why is no one held accountable?’

If anyone has any answers to these questions, I’d be overjoyed to hear them. And if it turns out that I’m wrong about all of this and the bunker room isn’t actually a horrifically inexcusable embarrassment in the selection process of H-, then I’ll apologize profusely to everyone I’ve implicated as being useless, lazy, disinterested, knuckle-dragging, or just plain stupid.

So far, I’m keeping my rage and aggression within the confines of the loss prevention department.
That is all.
Chris